“Misery loves company” – isn’t that what they say? Nowhere is that truer than on So You’ve Been Dumped. Around 50,000 global visitors – comprised of men and women, straight, bi-sexual and gay, from 16-60 (give or take) log on here each month.
As it’s the World Wide Web, it means that there are people logging into the Site – every hour of the day, but sometimes simply reading stories is just not enough…
So for people who are looking for a Break-up Buddy, read on! This is a term I coined years ago for people who are willing to offer their services, to be a support person for one or more people. Paying it forward, if you will. They may be in the trenches or have moved on completely (or may even be somewhere in between).
An SYBD “Sponsor”
Though I’ve never been in A.A. or anything like that, I’d sort of liken this person to be a sort of “sponsor” – someone who you can lean on when you feel challenged by your pain due to a break up. Maybe you use them to send the messages (rants) that you’d like to be sending to your ex.
You may ask them for advice or you might just need someone to be a sounding board – an empathetic ear.
Over the years, I’ve watched people connect with others who logged on around the same time as each other. They often become close friends – private messaging, some times meeting up in person, and in doing so incredible bonds are formed.
It’s actually one of the most rewarding parts of my job – knowing that, because I was dumped all those years ago, these people are becoming friends (and sometimes even more!).
We have actually had a wedding – and a recent baby to boot! So something good definitely came out of their buddying up. (Note: Sorry, I can’t guarantee that something like that will happen to you).
It’s nice to see that when people’s world’s have often been, seemingly ripped apart, the these bonds help the site members put the pieces back together.
SYBD – A Movie
When I began filming my SYBD movie back in 2006, one of the questions I tended to ask was – did the people make any friends through the Site. Not surprisingly most of them said “yes”.
When asked if they still remained in contact – again most of them said “yes”.
So once again, please never under estimate the connection that can be made on the Web.
Reach Out To Your Buddy
So these break up buddies will be people you can call upon night or day – who will be willing to listen with empathy, and to keep you from contacting your ex (if you’re in a No Contact phase of recovery that is).
Many people have no one to talk to about their pain (or they’ve bored friends and family to death by now) so these “Breakup Buddies” can be a considerable help. Even for those who do have close family and friends – maybe they don’t really empathise or it’s been a long time since they went through a break up they don’t quite understand why you’re not “over it” by now.
So really these people, the Break Up Buddies, are different than your real friends because they’ll either be going through or just having been through – exactly what you are.
If you’re in the raw stage of recovery, or even just past it and in need of support, then the Break-up Buddy – may be just what you need to help you move on. The person may be around the corner – or around the world – but either way, their support will most likely be invaluable.
Don’t take my word for it – see for yourself. It’s a FREE option I am offering you – so what have you got to lose?
State your interest in the comments below. Please don’t put your full name or any links/email addresses. I’ll match you up with someone privately.
Or if there isn’t someone recent or fitting, then, in rare cases, I might just be your buddy myself! 🙂
If you haven’t already, please share how when and where your break up happened.