17 Funny Breakup Lines from SYBD
As soyouvebeendumped.com turns 17 this week, I thought we’d do something special to mark the occasion – so here are 17 Funny Breakup lines for you. These are actual dumping lines that have been emailed in or submitted to the blog over the years. Feel free to add your own or comment on any of these in the comments sections below.
1) “I don’t think breaking up with you is the solution, but I’m feeling a lot of pressure to leave the country for a couple of months, right now.”
2) “I just need some space, to do my own thing without you, but I don’t want you to date anyone else for a while because you might be ‘The One’.”
3) Anyone else you’d like to be having a relationship with at the moment?
4) Don’t get me wrong, I really love your boobs, but I thought they were real…Now that I know they’re fake, I can’t be with someone that shallow.
5) I can see us together forever, just not with your two kids. If you didn’t have them,
then we would have something.
6) I can’t see you anymore. Your house is a tip and mine is spotless and I’m a bloke.
7) I know you’re not the one because you leave the lid off the toothpaste and my mother would never do that.
8) I look at you and see the next cigarette or pint of beer.
9) You’re too old to have the number of children I want to have.
10) We have too many music differences. I really like the new Radiohead stuff and you’re just into the old stuff.
11) Our relationship is like a very old car – too many pieces are broken, so it’s not worth it to try to fix them. I’d rather look for a new one.
12) Me breaking up with you, well it’s like childbirth. Sure it hurts like hell for a while but then you’ll forget the pain completely when you find someone else to make you happy.
13) I thought that eventually you’d be as good in bed as I am. I don’t think that’s going to happen.
14) Even though we’ve been together for two years, you’re Jewish and I’m Catholic, what would the Pope say?
15) I have no joy in my life. The only time I am happy is when I am with my cats.
16) I mustn’t be dependent on anything. That’s why I don’t even drink coffee.
17) I’m sorry, you’re just too boring to be my girlfriend – but you’d make a great wife. Maybe in a few years I could get back in touch.…
You will no doubt conclude that people say the craziest things when breaking up with their partners. This is true whether male or female, young or old.
Feel free to share a breakup line with me in the comments below. Or if you want you can read a much longer list of SYBD’s crazy breakup lines here, and share it there.
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