This week we hand over the Guest Blog to Australia’s dating expert from NW Magazine – reality chick. This week’s topic is one that’s dear to my heart and threads about “Red Flags” have come up again and again over the years. (This one is a particular fave).
Is it a case of hindsight being 20/20 or do we simply make erroneous decisions and remain purposely oblivious when it comes to dating? NOTE: This particular article is for the girls, but don’t worry guys – we’ll be advising you soon! Watch this space…Over to miss rc…
Warning, Red Flag Ahead:
“I never saw it coming” is arguably the biggest break-up lie in the book. And whether you were married for twenty years or boinking like bunnies for two weeks, slipping on a pair of rose-coloured relationship glasses is all about survival when you’re in a world of pain.
But, when the heartache is over, as Cher likes to say, it’s easy to see there were signs all along.
In fact, in the interests of helping you readers head off inappropriate lovers at the pass, here’s my personal flag system, colour-coded for ease of use.
Yellow flags translate as Cause For Concern
Orange means Warning, Warning!
Red says: Abandon Mission and Get The Hell Out, Now!
I like it when a red flag pops up early, because at least you know what you’re dealing with and only have yourself to blame if you push on and hope for the best.
We’re talking such Red Flags as:
- “I’m still in love with my ex girlfriend”
- “I have children with three different women”
- “I can only get off in a threesome situation.”
Yellow Flags are trickier.
No compliments from a guy, even if he seems to like you, could be a potential flag.
A first date who insists on going dutch when the bill is under ten dollars (or pounds) – may also be a cause for concern. Particularly if he asked you out.
It’s the Orange Flags that should really send your antenna nuts.
Like the fact that you’re always doing the calling – or six months in, you realise you haven’t met any of his friends or family.
Your sex life spluttering and dying a month in should also trigger alarm bells. “A month? A month?! Are you freaking kidding me? The only thing he should be tired of is thinking of different ways to ravage you,” insists He’s Just Not That Into You guru Greg Behrendt.
I know flags can suck. But they’re all we have in sizing up future partners. What are some of the biggies you’ve ignored … at your own peril?
Best friend to the broken-hearted and saviour to the terminally single, relationships guru reality chick is here to help. Got a question? Head to www.realitychick.com.au for some free, no-holds barred advice