SYBD ARCHIVE ARTICLE: Here is a timeless article written by Lorna Mackinnon from the early days of SYBD called “When You’ve Been Dumped: How The Sun Signs Handle Break-ups“. I thought this one was worth visiting because quite a few of you seem to be searching for astrology information with regards to breakups! So if that’s you, enjoy! Lorna’s book is: ‘Cosmic Coaching – Unleash Your Star Sign’s True Potential’.
While many astrologers write about seducing, loving and living with the different Sun signs, very few of us cover the topic of breaking up.
So here is a quick guide to how the different Sun Signs handle breaking-up…
Boredom usually kills most Aries affairs stone dead. Aries loves the adrenaline rush or new love and gets bored once love has been won. For Aries most of the excitement comes from overcoming the obstacles to love, so if you want to keep your Aries lover on his or her toes always maintain a little hidden part of you for Aries to uncover. You should also enthuse wildly about all of Aries’ new ventures, introduce the voice of reason at a later date. Too early and you’ll find yourself frozen out and accused of being unsupportive. Aries will try and try to keep a relationship vibrant and new but if this fails the ram will charge off through the door to pastures new. If you hurt Aries deeply, you can expect to be frozen and completely – your red-hot lover will turn glacial instantly.
It takes a long time for Taurus to give up on a relationship and cut their losses. However once Taurus has decided to leave a relationship there is no turning back.
While Taureans find it hard to admit, that they have been wrong about a person, they are not the best judges of character. As Taurus tends to be an honest and straightforward individual he or she will tend to assume that all is well, even if a partner is deceitful. When the bull does discover that a lover has been less than honest they may still cling on to hope.
Gemini ends the affair when he or she gets bored or when a partner makes to many emotional demands. While the affair may appear to end suddenly, Gemini has no doubt been secretly unhappy for a long time. Once a decision to end the affair has been made it will be irrevocable and Gemini will merely freeze the lover out or vanish.
Coach’s Tips and Exercises for Combating Boredom in Your Relationship
Make a list of five things that you find boring in your current relationship. Make it a priority to work them out in order. The next time that you are bored having sex with a partner share a fantasy with them. Ask them to co-star. Call attention to the boring spots in your relationship with your lover. See if (s)he’s bored at the same places and times. Work out how you as a couple can address this. If a partner ends the relationship, Gemini will be deeply insecure and at a loss. Gemini will mask these feelings from the outside world with a display of dazzling confidence, while continuing to search for that elusive soul mate.
The confusion between emotional neediness and love can lead to problems in Cancerian relationships, so that the Cancerian needs to look at meeting their emotional needs from their inner resources before taking up with a partner. There are some exercises in the Cosmic Coaching book to help with this. Cancerians often feel that they are not loved enough, and so become clingy and demanding if a partner appears disinterested.
Unfortunately, the Cancerian will often cling more and more tightly as the relationship deteriorates, making separation very difficult. If the partner has been unfaithful, the Cancerian will react with jealousy and, occasionally, aggression because the hurt has been so great. A Cancerian who feels unloved may stray in search of loving attention. The Crab is unlikely to divorce, however, no matter how unpleasant the marriage becomes as a consequence.
When Leo wants to end a relationship, the partner is often still needed as a friend rather than a lover. This state of affairs can lead to divorce if the partner is, understandably, unhappy with this situation. This habit of keeping an ex as a friend can also interfere with Leos’ ability to form new relationships.
Leo is not the best sign at letting a partner know when it’s over, partly due to being a fixed sign and partly due to pride. Consequently some Leos withdraw from their partner or treat them shamefully, in the hope that the partner will drift off and Leo can rewrite history pretending the whole affair never happened. To combat this tendency Leo lovers’ who are about to dump (their partner!) might like to try the following exercise.
Exercise – Saying Goodbye
Leo is not always terribly good at setting an ex-lover free. Here is an exercise to help with this. Take all your old love letters from this person and burn them. Visualise yourself saying goodbye to them and loosening the bonds that keep you together. Bid them farewell and wish them peace and a brighter future without you. Make your imaginings as vivid as possible and burn incense, play music or use any other props that will heighten the impact of this ritual. What you are doing Leo is telling your subconscious that you are letting go of this person, your conscious mind should follow suit and the unwanted lover will ‘pick up’ that they free to go. If the lion is deserted by a partner, they will take months to recover from the blow and may never risk giving their heart completely again.
Virgos are very loyal and will try to avoid ending a long-term affair or marriage wherever possible – they also hate giving up and admitting defeat. Some Virgoans may keep trying repeatedly to make an unsuitable affair work rather than being pragmatic and cutting their losses. In spite of Virgo being a cardinal sign Virgos can have a tendency to remain stuck in a rut unless circumstances force them to change. However, when Virgoans change forced upon them, they adapt very well. However, it is usually rare for a Virgo to linger in a failing marriage. If sensible discussion does not resolve the issues or if Virgo’s sense of fair play is affronted a clean and final break will made. This Sign does not usually go for reconciliation and is virtually impossible to manipulate into starting again. If there are children involved, however, dutiful Virgo will usually see to it that they properly educated and that their material needs are met.
When Libra is rejected she or he initially feels extremely demoralised, however, Libra will quickly take the action needed to bounce back from disappointment. Libra will do their utmost to make their loved one fall for them again. Should this fail Libra and rejection by searching out another true love. If Libra chooses to the end a relationship the break will be as orderly and dignified as possible. Libra is most likely to reject a partner who is too demanding on the emotional front.
If the Scorpion has an affair, it is usually for one of two reasons: to advance their career or to help with the attainment of a specific goal e.g. power over someone or because the sexual life within the marriage has gone wrong. Scorpios can attract a new partner with little effort, and also, hold back emotionally so ending the affair is comes easily to them. If Scorpio is rejected he or she will become very vengeful, either acting immediately or biding their time – this sign never forgets and rarely forgives.
If a partner is demanding or possessive, the Centaur will rapidly ride off into the sunset. Sagittarians are exceedingly sociable and crave stimulation, so are prone to having the odd casual affair if the relationship becomes stale.
Have a look in the Gemini section on relationships in my book, ‘Cosmic Coaching – Unleash Your Star Sign’s True Potential’, to combat boredom in a relationship. You may want to read the Gemini section in it’s entirety as this is a sign, which, like you, suffers from a tendency to get exceedingly bored and wary of deep emotional commitments. You are two of the zodiac’s free spirits.
The typical Capricorn does not go for one-night stands or casual affairs and tends to do their best to make a relationship work. When a relationship begins to fail Capricorn will, initially, do their best to make it work and will take rather more time than most zodiac signs before calling things to a halt. This is a sign that is devoted to duty, partner and children and has a strong dislike of divorce. However, once Capricorn decides to part the ending of the relationship will be abrupt and final. If a partner ‘cheats’ on a Capricorn, he or she will try to organise things so that the partner can be reunited with the family. Those partners who continue to cheat do so at their peril, however, for Capricorn can turn rather nasty!
Aquarians tend to devote themselves to one partner at a time and will only stray when curiosity leads them elsewhere. The water bearer likes to dominate any relationship, as a way of keeping those scary emotions in check and will not tolerate possessiveness. As Aquarians hate both confrontation and divorce they will tend to subtly manipulate an unwanted partner into being the one to end the relationship.
A Piscean can drift into a second relationship without even noticing or may get different needs satisfied by different partners – this is a sign that can compartmentalise romance(s) easily. Many Pisces continually drift from affair to affair hoping to dispel the self-doubt that can only be dispelled (and then only for a short time) by repeated assurances that the Fish are indeed lovable. Pisceans can drift out of a relationship for no apparent reason, still loving the partner (as a friend) but no longer being in love with them. Even the Fish may not know the reason for the break up; they’ve merely drifted away for whatever reason. The worst possible rejection for a Piscean is to be abandoned by a lover who no longer cares for them – ending a relationship with a Piscean requires steely resolve. Pisces will continue to cling; unable to accept that the relationship is over and convinced that if they reform in some way everything will be fine. An ex-partner of a Piscean may have to take extreme measures to extricate themselves from the emotional mess that a hurt Pisces can create.
More information on astrology, astro-coaching and relationships can be found in Lorna’s book, ‘Cosmic Coaching – Unleash Your Star Sign’s True Potential’.